


all good things.

by bitsori



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Break Up, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:41:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22160491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bitsori/pseuds/bitsori
Summary: Hyunjin expected this, but that doesn't mean it hurts any less. ( AU )
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 20
Kudos: 100





	all good things.

**Author's Note:**

> advanced apologies for whatever this is. ;;

✧

  
  
  
  


“Hyung, let’s break up.”

It’s Hyunjin who initiates it, and when he says the words, his voice is soft and somewhat shaky, as if he himself can't believe what he's saying.

As if a small part of him is secretly hoping that Minho will deny him of his supposed wish.

But Minho only looks at him blankly, no trace or hint in the latter's expression that he might want to argue.

_Let’s break up._

The reality of his own words sting Hyunjin, but maybe the even harsher truth is that they’re words he’s been waiting – no, _expecting,_ even – to say for the last ten months, two weeks, and five days.

He just really, _desperately,_ hoped to prove himself wrong.

  
  
  


Theirs was never an instant love story; before anything else, they were friends.

Well. _Sort of._

Hyunjin has to admit, he had a little crush from the get go – he doesn’t think anyone can blame him, really. He’d bet that at least half their friend group developed a crush on Minho at various points in time. (And—not to brag, but he supposes the same can be said about _him,_ and maybe that’s why he had allowed himself to believe that maybe they could work out. Heartthrob meets heartthrob – that should've been a good formula, right?)

They first met during Hyunjin’s first year at university, when he had been looking for possible extracurricular activities and student organizations to join; he’d been walking around campus grounds when Minho unceremoniously shoved a newsprint flyer in his hands.

“You look like a dog person,” Minho had stated, lips curled up at the corners in an intriguing feline manner. “You should join our group.”

It turned out that Minho was ahead of him in school, already in his third year of university and halfway through his approximated six years of Veterinary Medicine education (which, coincidentally was a track Hyunjin considered before someone, Jeongin, probably, had pointed out the amount of science involved; he'd promptly scratched it off his forms, and he ended up being accepted into university as a Sociology major instead). He was a member of a student group that regularly volunteered at an animal shelter that’s technically located in Gimpo, but is really closer to the heart of Seoul than it is to most areas of Gimpo.

The flyer Minho gave him was advertising this exact student group, and thanks to the pretty pictures of dogs that were printed on it, Hyunjin found himself in the middle of an orientation for the group, not even 48 hours later.

  
  
  


If you ask Hyunjin how and when he fell in love with Minho, he’ll tell you that he's not sure if he actually has a proper and concrete answer.

Explaining his initial crush is easy – crushes are shallow, and mostly inconsequential, after all. Hyunjin has had a lot of crushes in his twenty years of being alive, most of them having come and go without any real impact on him past fleeting chest flutters.

He assumes Minho has had a similar effect on others, after all, he's quite the looker. For Hyunjin, though – it was more about the way he was passionate about animals; even though Hyunjin can’t stand being around cats – their eyes generally freak him out, but more than that, he _literally_ could not be around them for long periods of time, because he’s allergic to them, and his skin always gets red and blotchy whenever he gets prolonged exposure to felines – there was always something about the way Minho’s eyes would light up when talking about _his_ cats that made Hyunjin feel a pleasant kind of stirring at the pit of his stomach.

But—the thing about Minho, as Hyunjin eventually found out, was that his passionate enthusiasm towards animals didn’t exactly manifest in the same way towards people.

Minho was the type to – actually, _that_ as the thing. Minho wasn’t someone who was easily boxed into a specific type. He reacted to life in a very casual manner that always made it seem like he never cared very much for anything, and yet the way he was always aware of what’s going around him – whether it was something as broad as current events related to the world in general, or something more personal the latest gossip regarding what’s happening to the people directly in his orbit, or even seemingly inconsequential information like detailed schedules of his friends – painted a different picture. He also cracked jokes Hyunjin could never anticipate – jokes that he didn’t always understand but made him laugh anyway, because he was Minho, and there was something about him that naturally made you feel like you had to laugh _with_ him, or you’re an idiot.

Minho had interests and opinions that easily flew over Hyunjin’s head eighty percent of the time, and the more they got to know one another, the more Hyunjin felt like they were complete opposites of each other. And yet it was this wall—these differences that drew him more and more towards Minho, fueling his desire not just to understand him, but to be _accepted_ by him.

“It’s precisely because you’re complete opposites that makes you feel that,” his best friend, Seungmin, psycho-analyzed him once. “And it’s fine if you want to understand him better, but I hope you see that his acceptance isn’t really all that. Minho is just… Minho. He isn’t special.”

And maybe that was Hyunjin’s problem – Minho wasn’t supposed to be anyone special, except to Hyunjin, he was.

  
  
  


There’s a moment, though – a memory that’s quite clear and vivid in Hyunjin’s head.

He had been revising his Philosophy notes and eating a snack by himself while seated on one of the outside benches that were set up along their university’s sprawling quad. He even remembers exactly what he had – two pieces of choco pie, together with a small bottle of almond milk.

Minho had appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, and parked himself on the empty space next to Hyunjin.

“Are you going to eat the last one?” He had asked, gesturing at the last piece of choco pie that Hyunjin still held in his hand – there were three to a pack after all, and he’d only eaten two. He hadn’t thought much about it, just held out the last piece, only to be taken aback when, instead of grabbing it, Minho had leaned in and eaten directly from his hold. The choco pie was gone in two large bites, before the warm flush creeping up from his neck completely reached Hyunjin’s cheeks.

“So,” Minho kept chatting, calm and casual; if the older boy noticed that Hyunjin was looking quite flushed, he hadn’t pointed it out. “How has your day been?”

The question was simple, straightforward – standard, even; but Hyunjin’s heart had started pounding doubly faster, louder, _harder_ against his rib cage, and he supposes, simple as it was, that was when he just _knew._

Minho was more than just a passing crush.

  
  
  


Hyunjin knows he’s good looking; he grew up having people compliment him left and right about his looks. He’s always wished that people would see there is more to him than what meets the eye, but he doesn’t want to dwell on that. (He does, though – he dwells on it a lot, but this doesn’t really have anything to do with his feelings for Minho, at least.)

He knows his looks net him a certain amount of attention, which means that Hyunjin is pretty used to people making the first move. He isn’t well-versed in the art of getting people to notice him because he’s never had to work for it before. And so, like an idiot, he had spent several months fumbling over attempts to get Minho to notice him in _that_ manner; he stuck to him whenever he can, asking for Biology tutorials, and taking all the same volunteer shifts at the shelter, never mind that Minho much greatly preferred working with cats, so they were always made to work different tasks at different areas of the shelter.

“This pining is pathetic.” It was Jisung, of all people, who finally knocked some sense into him. “Just ask him out on a date. Minho-hyung is the type to appreciate such straightforwardness.

If anyone came even close to understanding Minho, it was Jisung, and because of this Hyunjin actually took his words to heart.

The next time Hyunjin got Minho alone (after a general assembly that the head of their student organization called to discuss the rest of the term’s calendar activities, the entire duration of which Hyunjin was barely listening, too focused on waiting for the meeting to finally end), he followed through.

He made a show of clearing his throat as he walked with Minho to his car, and then—

“Hyung, would you like to go to dinner with me?” Minho had stopped in his tracks, and then he’d blinked at Hyunjin, seemingly surprised at the invitation. This, for some reason, helped build Hyunjin’s own confidence – maybe because Minho always acted so disaffected otherwise. “Or maybe coffee,” he continued. “Whichever, I don’t care. But I want to make it clear—it would be a date.”

He managed to keep his voice steady, no stammering or stuttering; not even a quiver in his delivery; despite this, no one was more surprised than Hyunjin himself, when after several beats, Minho broke out into a pleased smile, and answered, simple and matter-of-fact as ever, “Of course.”

  
  
  


But—

Maybe the fact that Minho loved cats should have clued Hyunjin in from the get go, because the older man was always more than just a cat person. He was also so very much _like_ a cat – confident, dynamic, observant, but also cautious and overly picky with affection. Opposite that, Hyunjin has always been more like the dogs he loves so much: adoring, and devoted, and in need of so much affection and validation.

Hyunjin was always aware of this fundamental difference, and maybe this is why there was always a small part of him that was waiting for the other shoe to drop; unsurprisingly, here he is now.

But expecting the worst never really makes it hurt any less when the time comes that you’re proven right.

  
  


——

  
  


“Okay.”

Truthfully, it frustrates Minho that this is all he can say in response to Hyunjin. He can tell that the younger male is doing his best to put on a stony front for his benefit, but that just means the way the younger's face so very visibly crumbles – albeit gradual, the picture of a slow burn breakdown – hits him even harder.

Minho wants to tell him instead, _It’s okay_ – that he shouldn’t work so hard to hide his pain. He’d like to think that he knows Hyunjin pretty well, and he knows that the more Hyunjin tries to keep his feelings in, the more they try to break free. This is why the younger is such a crybaby, and sure enough, it’s hard to ignore the way that tears are already forming at the corners of Hyunjin’s eyes.

He’s unable to actually say anything, the words feeling heavy and sticky as they get stuck in his throat; Minho supposes that he really doesn’t have the right to offer comfort anyway, not when he’s the one causing the pain.

The thing is this: Minho wasn’t – _isn’t_ – good at relationships.

He never was, and he never thought he would be. He was told frequently that he was good with people, but he has always been aware that was a lie. Minho was great at making acquaintances, subpar at keeping friendships, and the worst at cultivating relationships.

People are easy, because they’re mostly the same – there’s a predefined set of standards which allowed people to live life similarly, and Minho understood this. Animals were more complicated, and therefore more interesting – in comparison, people were less intriguing, and in effect, to Minho, more troublesome.

“It’s too much work,” is how he explained it to his childhood friend, Changbin, when the latter asked him why he never got too involved with the throng of admirers that he cultivated whenever he went.

Relationships made him feel like he had to adhere to certain expectations; like he was expected to perform a certain amount of skinship, or like there was a certain set of loving words to regularly offer his significant other.

Minho has always much preferred doling out unexpected affection; he liked being able to surprise people he cared about, revelled in being able to do things for people in a quiet and subtle manner that provided little to no fanfare.

And for a while, that worked with Hyunjin – at least until it didn’t anymore.

Minho can see that Hyunjin wants all the trappings of romance; that Hyunjin craves sweet nothings and big gestures – he’d never admit to any of that out loud, of course, especially not to Minho, but the last ten months (and an entire year of friendship prior to that) has allowed him to be able to see through the younger male well enough.

And, well, another thing is this: Minho thinks that Hyunjin deserves all that, and probably more, because Hyunjin is good, and pure, and true, and simply _genuine_ in every way that matters.

Minho doesn’t believe in putting himself down; doesn’t believe in beating himself up over Hyunjin deserving better than him, or not being enough for Hyunjin. But it’s true that he’s unable to offer Hyunjin what he desires, what he _needs_ , and it all boils down to the fact that Minho is bad at relationships; that what he’s willing to give, is not what Hyunjin is clamoring to receive.

Maybe he should have known better from the beginning; maybe he _did._ Maybe if Minho was a better person, then he wouldn’t have pursued anything – maybe he would have smiled at Hyunjin and turned down the invitation for a date instead, because then, maybe now he wouldn’t have to be the asshole breaking Hyunjin’s heart.

(He wouldn’t be the asshole whose own heart is breaking as his own limitations are laid out in front of him.)

So—

“Okay,” he simply repeats the affirmation, his voice low and soft.

“That’s it, then? _Okay?!”_ Hyunjin’s voice, on the other hand, is anything but. It’s filled with a mixture of anger and sadness, and at the end it actually _breaks,_ and Minho can physically feel the cracks in his heart spread and widen. “Fuck you, hyung,” Hyunjin hisses, and the fact that Hyunjin, however dramatic he sometimes gets, has never really been big on profanities, only lends more sting to his words.

 _I’m sorry,_ he wants to say, but it feels empty and unfair, so he remains quiet, only giving Hyunjin a shoulder shrug.

“Fuck you,” Hyunjin repeats, more resigned than angry now, a perfect reflection of the expression behind his eyes; he shakes his head, and then he turns his heel – even then, he hesitates, like he’s giving Minho one last chance to stop him and hold him back, but of course it never happens.

Minho isn’t built for relationships, and for the first time in his twenty-two years of existence, he thinks he might regret it.

  
  
  
  


+

**Author's Note:**

> happy new year! of all things to start iy with, it's... this. NEW DECADE, NEW ME!! ...ok im jk and hopefully, i'll be back to writing my regularly scheduled fluff soon enough. just needed to finish something quick and this happened to be the first short fic idea i had. i hope, somehow, this was still enjoyed bt some. 
> 
> feedback, as usual, is greatly appreciated!  
> [TWT](http://twitter.com/hanmings) && [CC](http://curiouscat.me/yiminho)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [all good things. [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24059281) by [alstroemeria_thoughts (aurantiaca)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aurantiaca/pseuds/alstroemeria_thoughts)




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